Polyamory is on the rise. According to a 2017 study, 1.5 million Americans identify as polyamorous, which is a 500% increase from the 1990s. Polyamorous relationships can take many different forms, but typically involve open communication and honesty among all partners.
In this blog post, we’ll explore polyamory in-depth, including its history and development, how it works, and the benefits and struggles of this type of relationship. We’ll also hear from experts on the topic and learn about one family’s experience raising a child in a polyamorous household.
Polyamory is a relationship style in which people have multiple romantic partners simultaneously. These relationships can be open or closed, meaning all partners are aware of each other and/or all partners are involved with each other.
Polyamorous relationships can involve any combination of genders, and there is no one “right” way to do polyamory. Some people in polyamorous relationships live together. While others maintain separate homes and see each other on a regular basis.
NOTE: Polyamory is not a sexual orientation, but some people who identify as polyamorous may also identify as queer, bisexual, or pansexual. Polyamory is a relationship style that anyone can choose to practice.
Types of Polyamorous Relationships
There are many different types of polyamorous relationships.
Based on Numbers
The most common type is the triad. A triad is a relationship between three people. Other common types of polyamorous relationships include quads, V’s, and N’s.
Triads: The most common type of polyamorous relationship is the triad. A triad is a relationship between three people. Triads can be either monogamous or non-monogamous. Monogamous triads are relationships where all three partners are monogamous with each other. Non-monogamous triads are relationships where at least one partner is polyamorous.
Quads: Quads are relationships between four people. Like triads, quads can be either monogamous or non-monogamous. Monogamous quads are relationships where all four partners are monogamous with each other. Non-monogamous quads are relationships where at least one partner is polyamorous.
V’s: V’s are relationships between five or more people. V’s can be either monogamous or non-monogamous. Monogamous V’s are relationships where all partners are monogamous with each other. Non-monogamous V’s are relationships where at least one partner is polyamorous.
N’s: N’s are relationships between two or more people. N’s can be either monogamous or non-monogamous. Monogamous N’s are relationships where all partners are monogamous with each other. Non-monogamous N’s are relationships where at least one partner is polyamorous.
Based on Arrangement
There are many different types of polyamorous relationships. The most common are:
Swinging: Swinging is a type of open relationship in which couples swap partners and engage in sexual activities with other couples.
Polyfidelity: This type of relationship involves three or more people who are all sexually and emotionally involved with each other. All partners are considered equals, and there is no hierarchy among them.
Solo Polyamory: This type of polyamory involves people who have multiple romantic partners, but do not live with or are not sexually involved with all of them.
Open Relationship: In an open relationship, partners agree that they are free to have sex with other people. These relationships typically involve some level of emotional connection with other partners, but not always.
Polyamory Vs. Polygamy
The term “polyamory” is often confused with polygamy, which is a relationship style in which one person has multiple spouses. Polygamy is illegal in the United States, while polyamory is not.
Polygamy typically involves a man having multiple wives, while polyamory can involve any combination of genders. Additionally, polygamous relationships are typically not equal, with the man having more power than the woman.
NOTE: Polyamorous relationships are built on equality and communication among all partners.
Polyamory Vs. Compersion
Compersion is a term that is often used in the polyamorous community. It describes the positive feelings someone experiences when their partner is happy with another partner.
In other words, compersion is the opposite of jealousy. While jealousy is a common emotion in monogamous and non-monogamous relationships, compersion is unique to polyamory.
NOTE: Compersion is one of the key benefits of polyamory, and it can help to strengthen relationships when used correctly.
History And Development
The history of polyamory is difficult to trace because it is not well documented. However, there are some theories about the origins of polyamory.
- One theory suggests that polyamory is a natural extension of human sexuality. This theory argues that humans are not naturally monogamous and that polyamory is a more natural way of relating to others.
- Another theory suggests that polyamory was created as a way to form stronger bonds between people. This theory argues that by having multiple partners, people can create a stronger support system.
NOTE: The reality is that we don’t know for sure where polyamory comes from. However, it is clear that polyamory has been around for centuries, and it is likely to continue to grow in popularity.
Rationalizing Polyamory Scientifically
When it comes to defending polyamory, there are two main arguments: first, that humans are not naturally monogamous; and second, that polyamory can offer benefits that monogamy cannot.
The first argument is based on the fact that there are many cultures in which polygamy is practiced. If humans were truly meant to be monogamous, then polygamy would not exist in so many cultures.
The second argument is based on the idea that polyamory can offer benefits that monogamy cannot. These benefits include:
- Greater intimacy and connection with partners: In a polyamorous relationship, you are able to have multiple intimate relationships. This can lead to a greater sense of connection and intimacy with your partners.
- Increased empathy and compassion for others: In a polyamorous relationship, you are constantly exposed to different types of relationships. This can lead to increased empathy and compassion for others.
- More fulfilling sexual experiences: In a polyamorous relationship, you are able to explore your sexuality with multiple partners. This can lead to more fulfilling and satisfying sexual experiences.
- Stronger support networks: In a polyamorous relationship, you are able to create a stronger support network. This can lead to greater emotional stability and security in all areas of your life.
- Greater communication and negotiation skills: In a polyamorous relationship, you are constantly communicating and negotiating with your partners. This can lead to greater communication and negotiation skills in all areas of your life.
NOTE: While there is no scientific evidence to definitively prove that polyamory is better than monogamy, there are a number of arguments in favor of polyamory. The arguments for polyamory are based on the idea that it is a more natural way of relating to others and that it can offer benefits that monogamy cannot.
From Evolutionary Biology Standpoint
There is some evidence to suggest that polyamory may be an evolutionary adaptation. This evidence comes from studies of animals, which show that polygamous relationships are more common than monogamous ones.
For example, studies of primates have shown that about 90% of primate species are polygamous. This suggests that polygamy is the more natural state for primates and that monogamy is a more recent development.
Additionally, there are a number of animals who practice polyamory, including:
- Birds: In some bird species, males will mate with multiple females. This allows the birds to have a larger number of offspring.
- Fish: Some fish species form polygamous relationships in order to increase their chances of survival.
- Insects: Many insect species are polyamorous, and some even change partners throughout the course of their lives.
NOTE: While there is no definitive proof that humans are polygamous by nature, the evidence from animal studies is suggestive.
Polyamory is more common than you might think. Polyamory has only recently become popular in the United States. According to a 2017 study, approximately one and a half million Americans identify as polyamorous, which is a 500% increase from the 1990s.
Why Do People Choose Polyamory
There are many reasons why people choose polyamory.
- Some people choose polyamory because they want to have multiple partners.
- Others choose polyamory because they want to create stronger bonds with their partners.
- Still, others choose polyamory because they want to experiment with their sexuality.
No matter what your reasons for choosing polyamory, it is important to remember that it is not for everyone.
Why Polyamory Is On Rise
There are many reasons why polyamory is on the rise.
- Some experts believe that it is because young people are more open to the idea of multiple partners.
- Others believe that it is because more people are living together before marriage.
- Still, others believe that it is because people are marrying later in life.
NOTE: Whatever the reasons for the rise in polyamory, it is important to remember that it is not for everyone.
Is Polyamory Better For Men or Women
There is no definitive answer to this question.
- Some people believe that polyamory is better for men because they are able to have multiple partners.
- Other people believe that polyamory is better for women because it allows them to create stronger bonds with their partners, hence multiple providers.
Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to choose polyamory is up to you.
Prone Personality Types
There are certain personality types that are more prone to polyamorous relationships. These include people who are:
There are a few personality types who are more likely to be polyamorous.
- People who are open-minded, creative, and independent are more likely to be polyamorous.
- People who are high in empathy and are good at communicating their feelings are also more likely to be polyamorous.
NOTE: Not everyone who falls into one of these categories will be polyamorous, and not all polyamorous people will fall into one of these categories. These are simply some personality types that are more likely to be polyamorous.
Working Polyamorous Relationship
Polyamorous relationships work best when all partners are on the same page. This means that everyone involved understands and agrees to the rules of the relationship.
Find Partners: The first step in creating a polyamorous relationship is to find partners who are open to the idea. Once you have found potential partners, it is important to sit down and talk about your expectations for the relationship. It is also important to agree on rules about sex and communication.
Establish Expectations: Once you have found partners and established expectations, it is important to communicate openly and honestly. This includes talking about your feelings, needs, and desires. It is also important to be respectful of your partner’s time and space.
NOTE: Polyamorous relationships can be challenging, but they can also be very rewarding. If you are considering entering into a polyamorous relationship, it is important to do your research. And be sure that you are ready for the commitment.
Foundations of Polyamorous Relationships
There are a few key foundations that polyamorous relationships are built. These include communication, honesty, respect, and equality.
- Communication is essential in any relationship, but it is especially important in polyamory. This is because polyamorous relationships involve multiple partners. It is therefore important to be able to communicate effectively with all of your partners.
- Honesty is also important in polyamory. This means being honest about your feelings, needs, and desires. It is also important, to be honest about your expectations for the relationship.
- Respect is another key foundation of polyamorous relationships. This means respecting your partner’s time, space, and privacy. It is also important to be respectful of your partner’s feelings and beliefs.
- Equality is another important foundation of polyamory. This means that all partners are treated equally. There should be no hierarchy in a polyamorous relationship.
NOTE: Polyamorous relationships are not for everyone. If you are not able to commit to the foundations listed above, then a polyamorous relationship is likely not for you.
Defining Cheating In Polyamory
One of the challenges of polyamory is defining what cheating is.
- For some people, cheating is any sexual or romantic activity that you engage in with someone other than your partner.
- For others, cheating is only considered to be cheating if it is done without the consent of all partners.
- Still, others believe that cheating is only when someone breaks the agreements they have made with their partners.
The definition of cheating can vary from relationship to relationship. So it is important to discuss what this means for you and your partner(s).
Jealousy In Polyamory
Jealousy is a normal emotion that can occur in any relationship. However, jealousy can be especially challenging in polyamorous relationships. This is because there is more potential for feelings of insecurity and competition.
There are a few things you can do to deal with jealousy in polyamory.
- First, you need to be honest about your feelings. This includes acknowledging when you are feeling jealous and why.
- Second, you need to talk to your partner(s) about your jealousy. This will help them understand what is going on and how they can support you.
- Third, you need to make time for self-care. This includes taking care of your mental and emotional health.
- Fourth, you need to be patient. It can take time to work through jealousy in polyamory.
There are a few things to consider before deciding if polyamory is right for you.
- First, ask yourself if you are able to commit to the foundations of polyamory. These include communication, honesty, respect, and equality.
- Second, ask yourself if you are prepared for the potential threats to your relationship. These include family pressure, social stigma, and cheating.
- Third, ask yourself if you are able to handle the challenges that come with polyamory. These include jealousy, time management, and communication.
If you can answer yes to all of these questions, then polyamory might be right for you.
Positives of Polyamory
There are many benefits to polyamory.
Some of the benefits of polyamory include:
- Greater intimacy: Polyamory can lead to a greater sense of intimacy with your partner(s).
- Greater flexibility: Polyamory allows you to be more flexible in your relationships.
- Increased sexual exploration: Polyamory allows you to explore your sexuality in a safe and consensual way.
Negatives of Polyamory
There are a few downsides to polyamory.
Some of the downsides of polyamory include:
- Less stability: Polyamory can be less stable than monogamy. This is because polyamorous relationships are not as traditional.
- Time management: Polyamory requires you to manage your time effectively. This is because you need to balance your time between your partner(s) and your other commitments.
- Increased responsibility: Polyamory requires more communication and organization than monogamy. This is because you need to manage multiple relationships simultaneously.
Challenges In Polyamory
There are a few challenges in polyamorous relationships.
These threats include family pressure, social stigma, and cheating.
Family Pressure: Some families do not accept polyamory. This can put stress on the relationship between the polyamorous person and their family.
Social Stigma: There is a social stigma surrounding polyamory. This can make it difficult for the polyamorous person to find accepting friends and partners.
Cheating: Cheating can be a problem in any relationship. But it can be especially difficult to overcome in a polyamorous relationship. This is because there is more potential for feelings of jealousy and betrayal.
Raising Child In Polyamorous Family
There are a few things to consider if you want to raise a child in a polyamorous family.
- First, you need to make sure that your partner(s) are on board with the idea of raising a child together. This includes discussing parenting styles and rules for the household.
- Second, you need to create a support network. This includes finding other polyamorous families to connect with and seeking out professional help if needed.
- Third, you need to be prepared for the challenges that come with raising a child in a polyamorous family. These include dealing with judgment from others and creating a safe and secure environment for the child.
Polyamorous Upbringing Vs. Traditional Upbringing
There are a few reasons why traditional upbringing is more favorable than polygamous upbringing.
- First, traditional upbringing provides more stability for the child. This is because it is based on a more traditional structure.
- Second, traditional upbringing allows for more parental involvement. This is because there is only one parent in charge of the child.
- Third, traditional upbringing is more likely to be accepted by society. This is because it is the norm in most cultures.
- Fourth, traditional upbringing allows for a greater focus on the child. This is because there is only one child to parent and care for.
Comparing Polyamory And Institution of Marriage
There are a few key differences between polyamory and the institution of marriage.
- First, polyamory is not monogamous. This means that you can have more than one partner at a time. In contrast, marriage is a monogamous relationship.
- Second, polyamory is not always permanent. You can choose to end a polyamorous relationship at any time. In contrast, marriage is traditionally seen as a lifelong commitment.
- Third, polyamory is more about love and connection than sex. Marriage is often based on the idea of procreation and sexual monogamy.
- Fourth, polyamory is not legally recognized in most countries. Marriage is a legally recognized institution in many countries.
Which Is Better
There is no right or wrong answer when it comes to polyamory vs. monogamy. The important thing is to figure out which type of relationship is right for you. If you want to have more than one partner, then polyamory might be a good option for you. If you want a lifelong commitment, then marriage might be a better option. Ultimately, it is up to you and your partner(s) to decide what type of relationship works best for you.
Are Open Marriages Happier
A study published in the Journal of Positive Sexuality found that open marriages are generally happier than traditional marriages. The study surveyed over 500 people in open marriages and found that most participants reported high levels of satisfaction with their relationships. The study also found that open marriages are associated with lower levels of jealousy, infidelity, and divorce.
Polyamory W.R.T Stability of Society
We can’t really talk about the stability of society without talking about what relationships are like in said society. Polyamory is still new, and as such, it has yet to be determined whether or not it is more stable than monogamy.
What we can say for sure, however, is that polyamory allows for a greater variety of relationships. In a polyamorous relationship, there is no pressure to conform to one specific type of relationship. This can allow for greater flexibility and adaptability.
Risks In Polyamorous Society
There are a few risks that come with living in a polyamorous society.
- First, there is the risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection. This is because you are potentially exposed to more sexual partners.
- Second, there is the risk of emotional damage. This can occur if you are not able to handle the challenges that come with polyamory.
- Third, there is the risk of financial instability. This can happen if you are not able to manage your finances properly.
- Fourth, there is the risk of social isolation. This can occur if you are not able to find accepting friends and partners.
NOTE: Arguments against polyamory typically center around the idea that it is unnatural or that it is too difficult to manage. However, these arguments are not supported by evidence.
Hearing From Experts
We spoke to two experts on the topic of polyamory.
First, we spoke to Dr. Elisabeth Sheff, a sociologist, and author of The Polyamorists Next Door. Here is what she had to say:
“Polyamorous families are just like any other family. They have their ups and downs, but they are able to work through them because they have a foundation of love and respect. Polyamorous families also have the benefit of greater flexibility and increased sexual exploration.”
Next, we spoke to Jill McDevitt, a sexologist, and author of The Truth About Non-monogamy. Here is what she had to say:
“Non-monogamy can be a great way to strengthen a relationship. It allows couples to explore their sexualities and connect with new people. However, it is important to remember that non-monogamy is not right for everyone.”
In this case study, we will be looking at the views of Dr. Jordan B Peterson on polyamory.
Dr. Jordan B Peterson is a clinical psychologist and author of 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos.
In an interview with Joe Rogan, Dr. Peterson stated that he does not think that polyamory is a good idea.
- He believes that polyamory is “exhausting” and that it leads to “jealousy and competition.”
- He also believes that polyamory is not conducive to raising children because it can be confusing for them.
NOTE: Dr. Peterson’s views on polyamory are not necessarily representative of the views of the general population, but they are worth considering.
The Reality Of Polyamory
While polyamory is becoming more popular, it is still not widely accepted. This means that many people who are in polyamorous relationships face discrimination and judgment from their friends, family, and colleagues.
However, the reality is that polyamory works for many people. And as it becomes more popular, it is likely that more people will be open to the idea of polyamory.
The Future of Polyamory
It is difficult to say what the future of polyamory will be. It is possible that it will become more accepted over time and become the new norm. As it allows for greater flexibility and adaptability, which could be crucial in an ever-changing world. Alternatively, it could remain a fringe practice and never gain mainstream acceptance. Or Polyamory may very well be the future of relationships. Only time will tell.
NOTE: What we can say, however, is that polyamory is a viable option for those who want more than one partner.
Polyamory is a growing trend in today’s society. More and more people are choosing to explore non-monogamous relationships.
However, it is important to remember that polyamory is not right for everyone. It requires a lot of communication and organization, and it can be difficult to overcome the challenges that come with it.
If you are considering polyamory, make sure to do your research and speak to a professional before making any decisions.
A Word From Therapy Mantra
Your mental health — Your psychological, emotional, and social well-being — has an impact on every aspect of your life. Positive mental health essentially allows you to effectively deal with life’s everyday challenges.
At TherapyMantra, we have a team of therapists who provide affordable online therapy to assist you with issues such as depression, anxiety, stress, workplace Issues, addiction, relationship, OCD, LGBTQ, and PTSD. You can book a free therapy or download our free Android or iOS app.