No one ever said that recovering from a broken heart would be easy, but it is possible. If you are struggling to rebuild love after emotional damage, know that you are not alone. Millions of people have gone through the same thing. The first step is to accept that your relationship is over and that the pain you are feeling is real. After that, it’s time to start the healing process. In this article, we will discuss some helpful tips for rebuilding love after emotional damage.
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Emotional Damage In Relationships
Unlike the picture-perfect portrayal of romantic love in movies and social media, relationships come with their fair share of bad days, rough patches, disagreements, and fights. Many times, couples even unintentionally or intentionally hurt one another, causing emotional damage. Some commonly observed reasons for this hurtful behavior include instances such as:
- infidelity (cheating)
- lying
- manipulation/gaslighting
- difference in expectations from the relationship
- drifting apart
- losing/changing feelings
- shift in priorities
- not fulfilling your partner’s basic needs
- long distances
- compatibility issues
- lack of clear and honest communication
When a relationship starts going downhill, it can feel like your world is crumbling. All of a sudden, you are faced with uncertainty and pain. It’s normal to feel lost and confused after hitting a low with your partner.
Redefining Love After Emotional Damage
Love, as a feeling, is very subjective. It can encompass feelings of trust, acceptance, belongingness, as well as safety, among other things. But after a heartbreak, this definition may change depending on the context. For example, if your partner talks you down in front of others, it may make you feel insecure and doubtful of their feelings towards you. In such instances, it is always a good tip to remind yourself that feelings are not facts. You may have feelings of love towards someone, but if the person repeatedly lies to you or keeps you second-guessing, then it is crucial to remember that it is not worth the amount of emotional investment. Prioritizing to who you give your mental headspace is very important for fruitful regulation of emotions and forming a healthy idea of relationships.
Which Relationship Is Worth Saving?
When a relationship ends, it can feel like your world is crumbling down around you. You might feel lost, confused, and heartbroken. These are all normal reactions to the end of a relationship. But just because they are normal, doesn’t mean that they are easy to deal with.
If thinking about getting back together with a person who hurt you, keep in mind some factors. These may include questions such as:
- Is this person sincere about their apology?
- Does this person make my mental health worse or better?
- Is the intensity of their betrayal worth giving a second chance?
- Is this obstacle us against the world problem?
- What will be the result of forgiving and letting go?
- Will I be able to manage my trust issues around this person?
After having a rough answer to these questions, you can work towards formulating and processing a rational, informed, and self-satisfactory answer for yourself before talking to someone else about it.
Tips For Rebuilding Relationships After Emotional Damage
Once you have accepted that your relationship is over, it’s time to start rebuilding. Here are a few tips for rebuilding love after emotional damage:
Avoid jumping back into things
If you decide to give the relationship a second chance, it is important to sit with your feelings and honor and process them before taking a second step. It may be difficult, but try to keep a rational and aware mind while deciding to forgive or forget.
Talk to a therapist
Undergoing couple or individual counseling can help you understand your emotions and work through the pain of your hurt. They can also guide how to rebuild healthy relationships in the future.
Try to work on the relationship in a new light
Rebuilding a relationship can provide an opportunity to rekindle and nurture the feelings of love and excitement in a new way. While keeping in mind the person’s flaws, try to find ways to love them while rationally handling their issues.
Set boundaries with your partner
It is important to be vocal and assertive about your boundaries and expectations with someone who has hurt you in the past. Attempt to mold your feelings and hopes by the person’s reality instead of idealizing what they could be.
Let go of unrealistic expectations
It may seem so in the movies, but one single magical kiss never suffices for the hurt someone puts you through. Bring up your honest feelings of hurt/anger/frustration/betrayal, demand for apology and accountability, take your time to process the feelings and make a well-aware and informed decision before forgiving them.
Focus on self-care
After a rough patch, it’s important to focus on taking care of yourself. This means eating well, exercising, getting enough sleep, and spending time with supportive friends and family members.
Avoid unhealthy coping mechanisms
It’s natural to want to numb the pain you’re feeling after getting hurt, but it’s important to avoid unhealthy coping mechanisms such as alcohol, drugs, and compulsive spending. These things will only make you feel worse in the long run.
Build a support system
When you’re going through a tough time, it’s important to have a supportive network of friends and family members to lean on. These people can offer emotional support and practical help when you need it.
Conclusion
Love is a feeling of strong attachment or admiration and concern for someone or something. It can also be described as a deep feeling of affection. So, when you are trying to rebuild love after emotional damage, you need to focus on rebuilding the feelings of attachment, admiration, and concern that you once had. Emotional damage in a relationship can be incredibly difficult to deal with, but it is possible to rebuild love after the pain. By following the tips above, you can begin the process of healing and start rebuilding healthy relationships in your life.
A Word From Therapy Mantra
Your mental health — Your psychological, emotional, and social well-being — has an impact on every aspect of your life. Positive mental health essentially allows you to effectively deal with life’s everyday challenges.
At TherapyMantra, we have a team of therapists who provide affordable online therapy to assist you with issues such as depression, anxiety, stress, workplace Issues, addiction, relationship, OCD, LGBTQ, and PTSD. You can book a free therapy or download our free Android or iOS app.